A few months later, in November, I send a quick email to Mr. Faraway: I need some information that he probably has, related to the Board we both sit on. He replies quickly with the information, and I thank him and turn my attention elsewhere, and am surprised to receive another email.
You’re welcome, he says. Also, I have some news I suspect I should share with you as I have been gradually letting the rest of the Board know.
From there, he has cut and pasted an email diplomatically telling friends and family that he and his wife plan to divorce. It’s a tactful letter, asking for civility and respectfulness and mostly for neutral behavior, so that they can manage this hard, shared transition in the best interest of their children. It reflects on all the positive things that have come out of their 25-year marriage.
It is so warm and respectful that I cannot understand how they could arrive at such a point that they could not resolve whatever their differences might be.
I get a hint, though, when I let him know I’m finalizing my own divorce and offer him my support. He replies with a quick message of appreciation and adds, I am confused how we got to this point and I suspect I will be forever.
It is not, he says, where I expected to find myself.
This makes me so sad. Gosh. Wish divorce did not have to be.